10th Month Anniversary

thats Mars beside the moon.

hey babe, (: happy 10th month anniversary.

every month i'll look back at this blog and just read it. a lot has changed since the first time we've got together. things came in the way and we made a new start but the beginning was always the same. i miss the old times. well, some of them. (:

so, its been 10 months, 40 weeks, 304 days, 7296 hours, 437760 minutes, 26265600 seconds. thats alot of numbers, and by calculating it, we have used up probably.. 400 hours of call time. (: thats alot.
okay, cut my math crap. time to tell you how much i love you.

so, on the night of 27th August. i stayed up till 12 waiting to call you and say those words. "Happy Anniversary, I Love You" but you were soundly asleep. its kinda funny hearing you talk while youre still half asleep. you moan everytime you try saying something. heh. its cute as well. (:

yeah.. then i went out just to see Mars thats brighter than the moon. it was so beautiful. the clouds were covering up the moon and the moon light shines trough it makes it look so vivid. and mars. it was just beside the moon, blinking, so tiny.

like i said, the moon was like you.. without you, i wouldnt be shining. you reflect the light unto me and everyone noticed me because i have you beside me. i love you.

today, i woke up feeling happy, your text made me smile. haha.. seriously. youre more creative than me. ): haha, fireworks display. how lame of me.

well, i just want to thank you for being there for me troughout the whole time. 10 months of being with Keiffer is tough. im sorry if i like got mad, or pissed, or moody, or whatever that you dont like troughout the entire time we've been together. thank you for putting up with my attitude, at times im childish as well. heh.

I love you babe. so so so much. i cant wait for two more months. i cant wait to see you soon. i cant wait to hold you in my arms. I Love You.

what more can i say, then to tell you how happy i am to be with a girl who's as beautiful as you, who loves me as much as you do. oh wait, that girl is you. (:

well, hope you'll have a great day. I love you hun. much much.

we're closer to the edge.

Hey babe, i haven't been in this blog for a month now. sorry i didnt blog about our anniversary last month. it was just cause i was so pissed about 'you know who'. well, yeah. its the 9th month tomorrow. 3 more months to hit the jackpot. (:

boo, throughout the whole 9 months we've been together. i can recall every moment we've been trough. the happy ones, the naughty ones. the awkward ones, the shy and so innocent ones but never the bad ones. i seriously cant remember the arguments we had. never did. well, except for last month and just recently of course.

i remember saying one time that i wasn't Shakespeare. well, i dont need to be one. i know why you loved me in the first place. its because i am who i am. (: youre coming down tomorrow to KL. thats the reason why i wanna see you so badly. i don't know if you know about it cause last month you forgot the date. heh. its all good. (:

i just miss you alot. yesterday i told you that i was just playing with you for a couple of weeks. to be honest, when Justine told me to make the right decision. i told her that this was the right choice that im making and on the first week i told Paullyn that i liked her but she's better off with that guy who likes her. she was pissed and we never did talk till last month. while everyone of my close friends we're telling me that i made a bad decision, i kept going on and you thought me how to love someone with all my heart. i've changed from a zero to a hero because of you.

let me tell you a story.

there once was a boy who was in love with girls, who appreciates them and knows how to treat them well, but when he had his first relationship, he found out that he was being cheated and he was really pissed. so what he did was try to make the girl he was with jealous by getting together with another girl and thats how he became a playboy. he didnt want to but everytime he loved someone, he ends up being the one who was getting dump and cheated on. so he was sick with girls and played them cause he thought all of the girls were the same. untill one day he met this random girl who was asking her about random questions. the girl fell in love with him. he could tell by years of experience with other girls. so he palyed along.

but one day, he realized that this girl isnt like any other ordinary girl. she was totally random. so, he took time knowing her and then they got together. after a week, he falled for her cause something happened.. he felt that theres hope and trust in her. thought there's gonna be ups and downs, he felt that she is true love. so it is untill now they are still together and its true, though the ups and downs they were still together hitting 9 months in their relationship. its awesome being with her said the boy. (:

yes, it is awesome being with you my random girl. i cant wait till the day i kneel down and say 'will you marry me. (: just yesterday i think i said its the 7th month and now its th 9th. thats fast aint it. (:

well, i love you babe. forever i will. i promised.

• promise to always love you
• promise to never look down on you
• promise to never give up on you
• promise to always be by your side
• promise to never play crazy tricks ever again on you
  and to
• promise i will never break up with you, leave you and will keep my promises.

I Love You boo, happy 9th month anniversary. Je t'aime Cloche, tojours et a jamais. it means, i love you Bell, always and forever. (:

Happy Seventh Month Dear. (:

its the seventh month now. (: im dead excited, honestly. i dont know what to do, what to get you, what to make you happy with. i have so many plans in my mind, but i dont think its enough for you babe. i have to do more than what i can think. i have to do something that i cant even imagine myself. sigh.. love knows no bounds. (:

last night, when we were on the phone. though you were annoying, i didnt really mine. i find it cute. (: its just you that makes me ponder into thin air and thinking till daylight hits the brim of my window. i could go sleepless if i just continue thinking of you. thank God i have dreams so i could sleep peacefully while i dream a dream that hopefully will be reality soon. (:

sometimes i know, im not as romantic as certain people you see, but im trying my best to be who i am that makes you love me. ill try do everything and anything that will make you happy. from a to z, you name it hun. ill do it. (:

since its out seventh month, i have seven things that i wish that will come true

1. i wish that, things for us will go smoother in time.
2. i wish that, i could spend a day with you on the beach.
3. i wish that, i can get you all the things that you'd wish for.
   
4. i wish that, by next year i can drive you around.
5. i wish that, we'll kiss under the rain,
6. i wish that, i'll propose to you in a way that you would not expect
7. i wish that, we'll get married and live happily ever after

those are the 7 wishes that i wish would come true. (:

i love you babe, more than words could express. sorry if it was a short one babe, im just lost for words. i love you. (:



PS/sorry the message sent late, didnt see that it wasnt sent. loves. :D

Am i living in a fairytale..

you know, when we we're little kids how we used to believe in fairy-tales, that fantasy of what your life would be. for girls it was always ; white dress, Prince Charming who would carry you to a castle on a hill far far away, being kissed to wake you up from a deep sleep, love and romance.
and for boys ; being the Prince Charming, looking for your princess in a white dress, being the perfect one for her and being able to stay beside her, probably revive her with the 'one true love' kiss.

we would lie in bed at night and close our eyes and we had complete and utter faith. Santa Clause, The Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, Cinderella. they were so close you could taste them, but eventually, we grow up.

one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. most people turn to the things and people they can trust, but the thing is, its entirely hard to let go of the fairy-tale entirely. cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, the hope of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true.

and i think mine has just begun. (:

six months back i never though my life would completely turn around when i met this girl. she was just an ordinary friend that i talk to when im down or pissed or just bored to death doing nothing at home. we started talking and i felt something different, something that other girl doesn't have. something that, clicks with me.

i was just a guy who talks to girls like they're a bag of chips that i get everyday, i was though, not is.. (:
so then i was caught up with a relationship problem and i told her about it. i had a girlfriend and i dont think that we're official and i liked this other girl, thats what i told her. and she was like, how can you do that. with the OMG face to be exact. (:

and after getting to know her better, we exchange numbers and to be honest, i thought it was just another fling and if i had a relationship with her, i didn't think it would last long. and after a week of calls and text i got a hint from her. she said she like a guy but shes not telling me who it is and giving me hints that it was me. (:
and i was doing the same thing, flirting back and playing cool with it.

but instead, i fell in love.

so i confessed my love to her. and up to this day, she's still mine. no matter the distance, disagreements, arguments, troubles, problems, hardship, and whatever that comes from hell that you can name of were at us. we're still together.

am i living in a fairy-tale, because she is my Cinderella, the one that makes my tummy tingles when i kiss, the one that makes my heart ache to know that shes going back to Johor, the one that makes me love sick, the one that fits my hand perfectly, the one that i can smell, the one that was made for me, my faith and hope and my fate. the one that i love.

it might sound crazy but, it seems like everything worked for me and her ; parents, families, money that i get to buy her stuff that i dont really know where it came from sometimes. sometimes im broke too. but its okay.. all worth it.

so you tell me, are fairy-tales fake, or is it real. because i am in one right now. (:
if it was fake, God please don't wake me up from this dream because i want to stay with her forever, even if it kills me to do so. i love her, more than the words that i have ever spoken out, more than the roses that was pluck from this earth and more than i used to love her and it gets more every minute. :D im love sick babe, please don't take this away from me.

so, at the end of the day, faith is a funny thing, it turns up when you dont really expect it. its like one day you realize that the fairy-tale may be slightly different than you dreamed..
well the castle, it may not be a castle. and its not so important to be happily ever after, its happy right now and hope it will last forever.

see once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you, and once in a while, people may even take your breath away. (:

ISABELL LIANG SHARFEN.
I LOVE YOU! ♥




.

Happy 6th Month Darling (:

it's been a long and tiring run, yet i persevere to continue on. keep on running till i reach my goal. every pit-stop is a place for me to charge up and continue going on, stronger at every checkpoint. now, I'm doubting that i can't make it, but as i came close to the very next check point, the sixth one to be exact, i saw you there, waving at me, smiling, calling me. i got back on my feet and kept hurdling towards you. i miss you, but i can only see you for a while. you'll be gone soon and i have to keep on running to get to you at the next checkpoint, now i'm stronger since you gave me the boost of courage and hope that we will make it in this race, you and me, and im gonna win in for the one ultimate prize. to be with you forever. (:



it's our sixth month dear. (: half a year. (: one hundred and eighty-three days to be exact..
it never made me regret that Tuesday night confessing my love to you. i was the most happiest guy this date six months back, and i am still happy the same way i was that day..

there's nothing more better than to talk to you after a tiring day, be with you after a long wait, hug you after a great date and kiss you, before its to late.. (:

all my life, I've never loved someone as much as i love you, never did i hold on to someone this long.. though we may not look things eye-to-eye sometimes, but we clear the air before dawn hits the the face of the earth. (: and i'm glad we do that.

i know, there's something bout the way you look in my eyes, you make everything just so damn easy, so easy that, i dont need to worry about a thing and when we touch, all i can see is the image of us, sitting by the ocean just before the dusk, sipping on a juice-box with sand between our toes, hand in hand together. (: it will come true one day, im sure of it..

its only physically but know that you'll be on my mind twenty-four hours at a time. no matter where you go, whether you're in JB or Penang or Cambodia or camp, i know you're not far, cause you're always on my mind. cause love has no distance or barriers to stop us from thinking about me and you, no, not for the two of us. (:

i seriously can't wait to see you this Sunday babe, i really do. it just blows my mind thinking that i'll be able to cuddle you again, hug you, hold you tight in my arms.. (: my tummy's tingling again just thinking of it.. heh.. :P
so, maybe we can swim and get lunch (: i know i'm broke but i think i can manage buying you lunch. (: i'll try look for cash.. heh.. *sorry*

i just wanna say thank you for being strong and always being by my side hun, i thank you for putting up with all the crap i have, i thank you for not judging me for a *** maniac. xD heh.
i love you x 59834750345437564897356 which sums up to.. er.. ASMUCHASTHESTARSINTHEUNIVERSEANDTHEHOLESANDCRACKSINEVERYPLANETANDALLIKNOWISITSFREAKINGALOTBABE! yea.. that much.. xD

so i guess this is the part where we really say we're in love, and the part that we're gonna say its forever.. :D maybe, we could also say, our first kiss the second edition. xD

i seriously love you alot.. im love drunk babe, and i never wanna get hungover by it. i want it to continue.. (: forever and ever..

ending with a text from you..
which reads..

*my heart skipped a beat. (: happy 6th month...i love you. FOREVER ANS EVER. XD*

FOREVER AND EVER it will be.. (:

early post. 6th.

My gah bee, 6 months already! :)
So fast. Time pass so fast! *__*
I donno what to blog about leh.
Seriously.
I mean, all the stuff that I love about you, I know I always text you all of them.
If repeat then boring d.
anyway.

( ) !!!!

there's a kiss in the bracket. :)
LOVES hehhehee.

so sunday, we go eat Mcd. (:
delivery?
If delivery, then who knows the food later cold and soggy. ):
eat there, I can't take out the vege. If not very messy.
da bao? Waste time. -_-
or~
we can go Pizza Hut. :)
or~
there's sushi king.
of cause, i'll take dad's money lah if ur broke (you are anyway)
so not to worry.
I just want to have a nice lunch with my *COUGH* darling. ;)
hehe!
OR~
we can swim.
yeah good idea.
don't want lah
you poke my belly later. *__*
Anyway, I love you bee.
Thanks for being by my side,
all the time.
I love you
much much.


Muacks.
banyak loves from,
bell.
your one and only awesome super cool, cute, pretty, beautiful, skinny, amazing, the one and only, bell. xD

Jesus Take The Wheel

Jesus take the wheel, take it from my hands,
cause i can't do this on my own.
im letting go, so give me one more chance,
save me from this road I'm on.

life's just screwed up lately, today was screwed up. i feel ; useless, unimportant, dumb, invisible.
i didn't know what to do, i tried giving you advises but you end up telling me not to. i couldn't help but thinking that hurting myself will get me out of this mess. it wasn't an option at first, i couldn't get hold of myself, till a friend of mine stopped me. i came to my senses, what's the purpose on hurting myself for something i didn't do, but still, the pain was inside me, the pain that i felt from seeing you getting all worked up and mad about something. i wanted to help, i tried to help. but i was shunt like any other being on earth.

this post isn't about me expressing my fucking emotions or whatsoever, no, don't get me wrong. i was pissed indeed, i ate and yet wanted to puke it all out again. my feelings were so mixed as if i was half way drowning in a whirlpool of sand instead of water, its heavy in my heart, i just wanted to tear up in the middle of the crowd.

as i stare blankly at my phone, awaiting a reply from you, my mind wondered into a thought of wretchedness and self-pity. for some reason, i don't know why. i didn't want attention, no, i didn't. i just wanted to be there for you when you were down. i am your boyfriend and yet, you tell me nothing, why? you make me feel deserted, stranded, alone.

i just felt pissed off about today,

"life's a bitch." Sue whispered in my ears, i nodded with sadness. i replied "girls a bitch, guys are jerks.", she answered back with a question that pondered my mind, "don't you think that trust in relationships and helping each others a killer instead? if it was because of bitches and jerks, nothing would go wrong, cause they'll not bother about whats happening to their loved ones and all they care about is sex"

so thus, today, all i did was stared blankly into space, thinking and thinking and thinking. people asked how is it going between me and you, i fake a smile and said were doing well. the feeling of telling a lie is just so burdening. i seriously do feel fucked up. mind me on my language but i can't help but not to curse..

girl, i just want to be there for you today, i felt lonely, miserable, useless, and any kind of suck-ish feeling when you couldn't be there to help someone when they have a problem. i almost cut myself, it's true. i just fell mad and sad at the same time. i don't like seeing you like how you acted yesterday. i love you, i want to be there for you like how you want to be there beside me when I'm down and out. i just hope you'll know that.


i love you, i miss you dearly..